Saturday, April 28, 2012

Safety... Thoughts poured out.


Fear,
We hide there sometimes…
It’s a good place
Because sometimes
Sometimes people get… angry…
Maybe not at us. Not directly. Not always at us no…
But angry…
Mad is not safe no, no mad is unpredictable
Painful
Everything but… Safe.
Hiding is safe. 
We are afraid.
Afraid of the dark… Afraid of sudden movement..
Unpredictable things. 
Things come out of the dark… Bad things… Scary… Things…
The darkness is born of darkness.
Did you know that? You do now. 
You can’t hide there, in the dark. 
It isn’t as safe as you think it is…
You have to see first.
We can. We can see, in the dark. 
In most darks. 
The ones we can’t, that’s not safe. 
There are shadows, in the dark. 
Not safe. 
Unpredictable. 
Sounds are angry. Loud, pressing, rising tones…
Signals. They show us what is going to happen.
Be careful when you speak.
We watch. We listen. Sometimes you scare us. 
Defense mechanism.
We fade, fade into ourself…  
We are small. You have to look, look for us. But we are safe. 
You are not. No one is safe, sometimes. 
People are triggered so easily…
Fear. Fear is safe because it is cautious. 
It watches. 
We watch. 
There is a difference… A difference between safe… And Safe…
Hiding… And not. 
When you are simply safe, then you are oblivious to what is going on. 
When we are safe we are careful. Watching. Hiding. 
We hide, sometimes.
You don’t. Not enough. You wouldn’t understand… 
It isn’t a fear that says you cannot. It isn’t a fear that speaks death. It isn’t a fear that gives in to peer pressure. 
It is a fear that sits in the darkest corner of the room, watching the others around it. 
Safe.
Angering no one…
Safe doesn’t Change itself. Not the way.. Fear does. 
There is the difference…
Wisdom verses reckless stupidity…
Safe. 
Verses safe. 
When people are mad they stop. No more long sentences… No more love. Short sentences. Broken words. Deadpan monotone, rising volume sometimes but not always… 
Quicker movements. 
Longer stares. 
No love. 
No love… Separation. 
When people get angry they put up walls. 
Anger is a wall. 
That is why anger is. Because people put up walls. 
And that is why when there are walls, the obvious answer… The safe answer… is assume anger. 
Always assume someone is mad at us. We do. We do so often. 
If we always assume someone is mad at us, we are safe. 
Always. Safe. 
Hiding… 
Touching. Touching is love is safe is not anger. Hugs. 
Yelling. Yelling is not safe is not love is anger. 
Cussing. Same thing. Jerking away. Same thing. 
When a person goes stiff as you hug them. When a person does not react… 
That is a wall. Walls mean anger. Walls always mean anger. 
Its the way the world works…
Hiding… In the dark away from the shadows…
The dark is not angry… Not mad.. Has no feelings…
People without feelings are not safe either. They simply do, for reasons based on science. For reasons based on proof. Proof doesn’t prove God. God proves God. God is emotion. 
The emotion.. Of logic…
Emotion is not safe either. It is not controlled. It changes. Too quickly. It turns. One moment everything is fine but utter three simple syllables and suddenly there is pain and with pain comes walls and with walls…
It is not safe. 
Safe. 
We are safe.
We know… How to watch… What to look for…
And now you do too.